A couple of years back, I had the pleasure of attending a Frankie Valli concert in South Florida. Being in my 70s, I expected everybody there to be the same age as me. I was wrong. The average age was between 30 and 50. Everybody knew the words, everybody knew the melody, everybody had a great time in singing along.
Than I attended a Beatles tribute band concert. Once again everybody was younger than me with the ages starting in the mid-twenties. They once again knew and sang the songs music and lyrics. There was absolutely no generation gap. I am sure that the reader of this article can remember words and lyrics to these groups’ top hits and so many others.
I began to reflect back at the Passover seders that I was at with my parents, friends and relatives when I was younger. We all sang the Haggadah songs that were part of the ritual that made the evening so much more enjoyable. Remember?
Yet today how many of us sing the songs that we grew up with? Are we just focusing on the story as fast as we can so that we can get through the seder and finally answer the fifth unwritten question, when do we eat?
I truly believe it’s time to take a lesson from the old yet current “oldies but goodies” by returning to the true flavor and songfest of the seder and the Haggadah teaches us how.
Ever wonder why the youngest child asks questions about events that haven’t yet occurred? They are asking why we eat matzah, dip two times, eat bitter herbs and learn even before we do it? It would make more sense to ask the question after it is done. The answer lies in the fact that in Hebrew school they learn about the seder before they do it.
If you are leading a seder, there is plenty of time to visit YouTube, ask a cantor, rabbi or ritual director to record, buy a CD to re-learn the lyrics and songs to the seder favorites: Kiddush, Ha Lach Manaya, Avadim Hayinu, Diaenu, opening of the Birchat Hamazon, Oseh Shlaom, Ki lo Naeh, Ader Who, Echad me Yodeah (who knows one) Chad Gadya (One Kid).
That’s 10 songs.
If a person doesn’t know Hebrew, the words can be found on the web in transliteration.
Imagine how boring it would be to go to a Beatles tribute band or Frankie Valli and hear them read the lyrics. Only when they add music do the words, story and emotions pour out.
Just like your children prepare for the seder, we as adults have the same responsibility to them. Do we accept shortcuts from them? No! Do we try and set examples for them as parents? Of course, we do.
It is a known fact that 70% of all Jews go to at least one seder. Why? For the matzah, bitter herbs etc.? No! For the experience and memories of the past and current. The same reason exists for a concert.
Think about this for a minute. How about practicing with your children. Sure they will say “I don’t want to! I want to play video games.” Yet, one of the top reasons children like being Jewish is they are able to be with family. Give them that experience they so yearn for. Isn’t that what your grandparents did for your parents and for you.
Just like the oldies, Judaism connects the old with the new. Why is it that the Frankie Valli and Beatles music have withstood the temptation of obscurity? Because they were repeated, handed down and enjoyed.
How can Judaism withstand the possible fate of obscurity? Through the Passover seder and all that is built into it to be repeated, handed down, learned and enjoyed.
If we don’t and continue to reduce the size and feeling of the seder, just imagine for a moment you being at a seder led by your children. Will it represent yours? Do you represent your parents or grandparents?
What an opportunity we have, today, starting now to prepare ourselves and our grandchildren for a seder that will attract energy and enthusiasm because you put passion to words and memorable melodies in the minds of your guests.
Andy Greenberg is a former national radio personality, TV talk show host and producer, author and a sought-after educator and lecturer on Jewish, business and secular topics. He lives in Lake Worth.